Hey guys! It’s been quite some time since I’ve posted on the blog, and let me say, I’ve missed the Garden immensely. A lot has changed in the past couple of months, and as I mentioned in my last update, I’ve been doing my best to be present with everything and everyone I’ve encountered. With these new experiences, I’ve noticed that there was more work for me to do. The thing about healing and growing is that it does not stop. The minute you think you have it figured out is when you get your first challenge. Let me tell you a little bit about mine.
When I started GoG, I told myself that I wanted to write about what I’ve learned and experienced about myself. Self-love, self-acceptance, healing, and growth. I feel as if I have scratched the surface of those topics. As life goes on and as I change and grow, so will what I call self-love, acceptance, and healing. When mapping out GoG, I decided that I did not want this space to be solely focused on relationships with others, whether it was romantic or platonic. Let me say, if you ever want to be wrong, tell the Lord what YOU plan to do. 😂
The prefix “re-“ means “to do again.” Construct means “to build,” so to reconstruct means “to build again.”—building again. When you say it out loud, it sounds daunting, but we construct something daily. Making choices to have the best day possible that’s construction. It is deciding to open your heart and pour in new light and love that’s construction. That’s where I’ve been for the past couple of months—choosing happiness and surrounding myself with people who make me happy.
I have spent a great deal of my life following little plans. Little plans I created in my head and mapped out on paper. I was writing and writing. Happy for the highs, working through the lows, and trying to remain grounded. I was constructing, demolishing, and repeatedly reconstructing until a plan worked. What I didn’t count on is what I left behind during those builds. What tools did I miss? What scraps did I pick up that I should have thrown out? What did I miss?
After taking inventory, I realized I had left behind how to categorize what I needed versus what I wanted. Those little plans focused on what I wanted but rarely what I needed. What I wanted was to have everything fall into its perfect place, but what I NEEDED was to allow God to work on my behalf. Leaving that behind at different construction sites made reconstruction HARD. Being puzzled by what wasn’t working and why it wasn’t working made it difficult to see the big picture.
So here I am, currently reconstructing, and I plan on sharing my lessons along the way. One thing I will say is this—I’ve met someone who has made choosing what I need more of a priority than it ever was before, and for that, I am thankful. I hope this finds you well, and I hope you come back soon!