Here, let me turn on this flashlight so we can chat. 30 is different. The people made it sound super sexy on the social sites! 😂 I was not expecting the shift that’s taking place right now. Everything that I thought I knew and thought I wanted has evolved. Now, I have to do the same. 💜

Have you ever heard of toxic positivity?

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“Toxic positivity involves dismissing negative emotions and responding to distress with false reassurances rather than empathy.”— UW Medicine, 2022.

I’m sure that GIF is a feeling we’ve experienced before. 😂 Telling yourself and telling others everything is fine when in actuality—it could be a WHOLE lot better. Empathy is a necessary soft skill. It’s the ability to feel and relate to one another. It’s real. It’s raw. And for a lot of people, it’s hard. No one wants to feel or experience sadness continually. That’s no way to live life. But ignoring sadness can turn into something much worse. A false sense of happiness and, believe it or not—that’s not sustainable.

“Toxic positivity is an obsession with positive thinking. It is the belief that people should put a positive spin on all experiences, even those that are profoundly tragic.” — Medical News Today, 2021

When I finally decided to shed the past, a false sense of positivity was the first thing I asked God to take from me. There is nothing wrong with being positive—let’s all be clear on that. But you cannot ignore that both negativity and positivity exist. The balance of those two things makes life what it is. One without the other cancels growth.

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I’ve been hiding behind some things, and it’s time to stop. I am not 100% happy all the time. I strive to be, but the fact is, there are some crummy parts that I could do without. Forcing myself not to feel sadness or any other emotion was a disservice, and it had to stop. It’s okay not to be okay. There is nothing wrong with not enjoying every single moment.

The pandemic caused us to focus on the positive. But what about the negative? I mean—it was sitting right there, too. How about this? Allow yourself to feel all of it. Then you can decide what’s relevant and what’s not.

We can all start by acknowledging toxic positivity. Ignoring how you feel causes stress. Don’t be stressed trying to hide your feelings. Be you and be authentic. That’s what I’m doing. My 30 is devoted to spring cleaning! I’m rearranging, rebranding, and renewing my life. By now, I’m sure you have discovered that I love the Moon Tarot. You can find them on Instagram and Twitter.

Take Care,

ToriB💕🌻